E.B.E.

Episode Summary
Mulder and Scully go chasing after a downed UFO that maybe doesn’t exist except for maybe it does. Or does it? Yes! Possibly. Scully meets the Lone Gunmen, Deepthroat and Mulder have some man time, some hippies throw a party for aliens, and Mulder sneaks into a secret military facility and discovers that OMG THERE REALLY ARE ALIENS, PROBABLY. And we all pretend that calling aliens “Extra-terrestrial Biological Entities” is totally a thing and not pretty silly.

The skies over Iraq

[EDITOR'S NOTE: FOR THE PURPOSES OF THE FOLLOWING JOKE, PLEASE PRETEND THAT IT IS STILL THE BEGINNING OF MAY 2010, WHICH IS WHEN WE FIRST STARTED WRITING THIS EPISODE. THANK YOU.]

Ha ha guys okay but we have to do an episode now so let’s just–

Guys, alright, but the blog–

GUYS! CHRIST!

So. Anyway, there’s a foreign guy in a jet in Iraq who totally sees a UFO. And he flips out and shoots the dang thing down. And then some American soldier dudes check out the crash site, but they’re interrupted by THE TITLE SEQUENCE OMG

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1×09 Fallen Angel

Episode summary:
On a tip from Deepthroat, Mulder books to Wisconsin to investigate the crash of a mysterious flying something-or-other, gets arrested by the army, and meets UFO conspiracy wonk/epileptic Max Fenig. Scully tries to take Mulder back to DC in time for the “should we close the X-Files” hearing, but hijinks ensue which culminate in the apparent abduction of Max by aliens. Probably. And then the X-Files don’t get closed after all!

Wood you like to hear what happened?

We open in the woods, in Wisconsin. A fire! Deputy Rike, from the sheriff’s office investigates the situation.

And then a cut to US Space Surveillance Center in Colorado! They’ve spotted a bogey.

It was flying around like no known aircraft could; also, it was an object. Additionally: not identified.

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“Pilot” – 1×73

Episode summary:
A girl dies in the woods in Oregon. FBI Agent Dana Scully is assigned to the X-Files — whether as a balancing scientific force or as a spy is less than clear. Her partner, Agent Fox Mulder, lays out the case of the dead girl, whose corpse bore a strange pair of dots on the lower back consistent with previous casefiles. The two travel to Oregon, where they investigate several members (living and dead) of the local high school class of 1989. After another mysterious death, they eventually encounter one of these kids, the erstwhile comatose Billy Miles, in the woods amidst a mysterious bright light. They return to the FBI with scant substantiating evidence of what they’ve seen.

We see a girl running, panicked, through the woods, tumbling and scraping herself on vegetation as she flees from whatever the heck she’s fleeing from.

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