Archive for January, 2011

Benny Hinn, Eat Your Heart Out

Miracle Man

Episode summary
Mulder and Scully investigate possible faith-healing-related murder, discover faith-healer isn’t a murderer, discover faith-healed faith-healer assistant is a murderer, faith-healer gets murdered by sheriff, sheriff’s wife doesn’t get faith-healed, murdering faith-healed faith-healer assistant murders self. Also Fox thinks he sees his sister Samantha like four times and Scully briefly reminds us that she’s Catholic.

1983

Some kid named Samuel lays hands on the crispy corpse of a guy who burnt to death in a fire. The corpse promptly hold the kid’s hand!

When I-I-I / Say to you-ou-ou
Ahhhhh, zombies!
No, no, the power of Christ compels him.

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E.B.E.

E.B.E.

Episode Summary
Mulder and Scully go chasing after a downed UFO that maybe doesn’t exist except for maybe it does. Or does it? Yes! Possibly. Scully meets the Lone Gunmen, Deepthroat and Mulder have some man time, some hippies throw a party for aliens, and Mulder sneaks into a secret military facility and discovers that OMG THERE REALLY ARE ALIENS, PROBABLY. And we all pretend that calling aliens “Extra-terrestrial Biological Entities” is totally a thing and not pretty silly.

The skies over Iraq

[EDITOR'S NOTE: FOR THE PURPOSES OF THE FOLLOWING JOKE, PLEASE PRETEND THAT IT IS STILL THE BEGINNING OF MAY 2010, WHICH IS WHEN WE FIRST STARTED WRITING THIS EPISODE. THANK YOU.]

You know what it almost is?
What?
Cinco de Mayo.
And that–
THE MEX FILES.

Ha ha guys okay but we have to do an episode now so let’s just–

You know, that reminds me of Mexicorn.
That is not a thing.
Any other day of the year, you’d have a magical horse with a horny protuberance on its forehead.
Holy shit, it actually is a thing, I thought you were–
But on Cinco de Mayo: MEXICORN.

Guys, alright, but the blog–

This is a thing that exists.
They should do an X-Files episode about the Jolly Green Giant.
And Little Sprout.

GUYS! CHRIST!

So. Anyway, there’s a foreign guy in a jet in Iraq who totally sees a UFO. And he flips out and shoots the dang thing down. And then some American soldier dudes check out the crash site, but they’re interrupted by THE TITLE SEQUENCE OMG

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